ChapNews Volume 13: Escape Artist

I have been trying to warm up to a new balm in vain. Vain, I tell you! What started out as decent has turned into abysmal. More on that tomorrow. Meantime, enjoy this tidbit about a crafty criminal. It's like Houdini meets Shawshank, plus lip balm:

McNair has a history of escapes.

He has used lip balm to slip out of handcuffs, and clawed his way through a prison ventilation system to gain temporary freedom.

In his latest escape, he hid in a pile of mailbags and was shipped to a local warehouse before he began running down nearby railway tracks.

He was stopped by a local police officer looking for him, but managed to talk his way out of the arrest by convincing the officer he was someone else, and just out for a jog.

Guest Post! Blistex Lip Medex

I don't know about you, but my lips are turning into sandpaper in this cold, dry winter air. What can bring relief? Today's poster is Melissa, who found us through Glamour's beauty blog. Fancy! Take it away, Melissa:

Chapstick is pretty much my addiction. I have gone through tubes upon pots upon sticks of every kind of lip remedy. I'm only 19, but I've probably gone through enough different kinds of chapstick to be considered 75. Basically, I have found my "holy grail" if you will, of a lip smoother, de-chapper, and all-around amazing product. It is in a heavenly blue pot, and it is called Blistex Lip Medex.

Here is a rundown of my fav chapstick:

Price: Usually around $1.49, depending on what drugstore you frequent

Appearance: I love the blue tub. It's a little bulky, but IT'S WORTH IT.

Glide: It's perfect. You have to use your finger, but once you put it on, it's like your lips died and went to heaven.

Flavor/Smell: Here's where people might have a bit of a problem with Lip Medex. It's definitely a menthol-y flavor and smell, definitely not something to wear if you're on a first date. But the product smooths and soothes my lips so well that it's worth it to wear everyday. If you have someone to kiss, just wipe it off. got my boyfriend addicted to this stuff, so you know that it works if a guy likes it (they have the driest lips!).

Lasting Power: It stays with you for a while, and it definitely hydrates chapped lips. I feel with most lip balms out there, your lips end up getting really greasy and waxy, and you end up needing to put more of the product on in about 20 minutes. Not so with Lip Medex. I usually don't have to reapply for at least 2 hours.

Product Pluses: Um, read above. It's so amazing. I usually put it on after a) I take a shower and I'm doing my hair or b) I just brushed my teeth. It's clear, and makes your lips look really shiny and healthy. And if you do have chapped lips, it WORKS.

My rating: 5 out of 5 tubes.

Kiss My Face: Lip Action, Mango Melt

This will be Chaptastic's third fourth review of a Kiss My Face balm, so I'll keep it informal. I bought this balm for a few reasons:

1. I like a balm whose name issues commands when I'm too tired to do so. "Kiss My Face!" Other suggestions: "Make Me Lunch!" and "Do My Taxes!"

2. It states, in tiny letters, "The Bearer of this Balm has helped us contribute $1 to The Alliance for Climate Protection AND has softer lips". Both of those are true.

The organic product savants at Kiss My Face and Whole Foods joined forces to raise $1,000,000 for Al Gore's foundation, whose purpose is "to persuade people of the importance, urgency and feasibility of adopting and implementing effective and comprehensive solutions for the climate crisis". I hope that doesn't mean they have to sell a million lip balms because that might take a while.

This eco-friendly balm comes in punny flavors like Eco-cocoa, Berry Warm and Mango Melt. I tried the Mango Melt and I found it delightful. Soft, amazing glide, pleasant yet light fruity scent, no waxy aftertaste...just brilliant. Makes me want to start a slow clap.

5 out of 5 tubes.

The Lip Action line also comes with SPF 15, which is important even in the winter. $3.49 at Whole Foods- remember that $1 of that goes to Al Gore, bless his heart.

UPDATE: An anonymous commenter says that KMF's holiday flavors are "pretty fantastic".